Location: Popsprocket -> Yix -> Quests -> Pipe Dreams
Level/Quest/Items required: None
Release Date: February 20, 2009
Objective: Make your way through the delivery tunnels and unlock the gates!
Objective completed: You did it! Now you have a secure passage into Popsprocket, behind enemy lines! Now go do something about your hair. All that steam made it frizzy.
Yix: Balthar's robots drove all of us here to the edge of town. We've been able to barricade ourselves here out the outskirts.
Yix: We can't open the barricade for you without risking everyone else...but there may be another way in.
Yix: If you can get into the project delivery tunnels and open the 4 steam matrix gates, then you'll have a safe way into town.
Yix: You'll have to work fast. Once you activate the steam, you'll only have a short time to alter the matrix so it will release the gate lock!
Yix: There are intercom tubes next to each gate, so you let me know when you're ready for me to start the steam.
Yix: If you take too long, or you can't fix the matrix before the steam is released...the pressure alarms will draw some of the Cykon guards.
Yix: Don't worry, it's much easier than it sounds and I'll walk you through it over the intercom tubes!
Yix: Grab your pipe wrench, <Character>! We might only have one shot at this.
<Character>: Ok, Um.. Testing, 1, 2... YIX?! I'M AT THE FIRST GATE! WHAT DO I DO NOW?!?!
Yix: First, stop yelling. I can hear you fine at your normal speaking volume. Next, you'll have to rework the steam matrix to open the gate.
<Character>: How do I do that?
Yix: As soon as you approach the gate the steam will start making its way to the matrix. You will only have a short time before it starts filling the pipes!
Yix: The steam will start at the steam valve in the Upper Left.
Yix: You will need to start clicking the boxes of the matrix and cycle through the pieces...
Yix: ... and build a path for the steam down to the pressure gauge in the lower right.
Yix: Remember, the steam will only go in one direction and it will always go straight when it can!
Yix: If you don't get the matrix reworked in time, it will set off a pressure alarm and you'll have to fight a cyklon guard and do it over.
Yix: Ready to get started?
Next Up: Popguns
Location: Popsprocket -> Yix -> Quests -> Popguns
Level/Quest/Items required: Completion of Pipe Dreams
Release Date: February 27, 2009
Objective: Yix wants you to make your way to the Popsprocket experimental tool storage facility for 2 very special tools!
Objective completed: Sepulchure was able to scoop up the entire Popsprocket experimental tool storage facility? That hardly seems fair. Well, so much for Plan A...
Yix: Now that you've got a way into the city proper, we need to think of a way to get to balthar and stop him.
Yix: Getting through his cyklon army won't be easy, but I think that we'd hit a spot of luck.
Yix: The steam tunnel that you cleared comes out very close to the Popsprocket experimental tool storage facility.
Yix: There will be lot of thing in there that the refugees can use to make our lives easier until we win back Popsprocket...
Yix: ... But there are 2 very special tools that I think we can use to make a kind of super-anti-cyklon weapon for you!
Yix: The first is called the Sparkane Sapper. It was designed to sap all the magic and electrical power from fuel cells.
• Picture of Sparkane Sapper
Yix: We used it on certain machines, so they would be safer to work on, then we would just recharge them when the repairs were done.
Yix: The second is the Rapidfreeze Sample Saver. It was built to flash freeze living plant specimins for transport and study.
• Picture of Rapidfreeze Sample Saver
Yix: I can put them together and you'll have a weapon that you can use on those robots!
• Picture of together
Yix: One shot from that baby will sap their power cells dry, freeze their water tanks and ice over their gears! They'll never know what hit 'em!
Yix: The storage facility is very close to the Mechagryphon hatchery-factory, so you'll have to fight past the insane mechagryphons.
Yix: Once you get to the storage facility, contact me through the TalkyTubes and i'll give you the keycode to the door.
Yix: Good luck, <Character name>. If you pull this off, it wil make stopping Balthar a lot more.... possible.
In the quest you will battle 8 Mechagryphon.
<Character>: Yix, I think I'm here... But I've encountered a small wrinkle in the plan.
Yix: What's wrong?
<Character>: The tools aren't here.
Yix: What? The tools have been stolen?!?!
<Character>: Not... exactly...
<Character>: The building has ben stolen.
Yix: That's increadible! But how is it possible? What is bigg enough to steal an entire industrial storage facility?
<Character>: I can only think of ONE thing... and it's not good.
Drakath: My lord Sepulchure, the Popsprocket experimental tool storage facility has been captured.
Drakath: The tools are being catalogued. Some of those inventions are amazing.
Drakath: These tools will give us a huge advantage in our battles... but there is bad news...
Drakath: Our spy in Falconreach reports that <Character name>...
Doom Blade: HAHAHAHAHAH! YOU ARE VERY EAGER TO EMBRACE THE DARKNESS, DRAKATH!
Sepulchure: ...Is in the town below us. I know.
Sepulchure: I can sense him(her). That power is unmistakable.
Doom Blade: HAHAHAHAHAH! ARE YOU ARE LITTLE WORRIED, SEPULCHURE?
Sepulchure: I fear nothing. <Character name> is powerful but he(she) is only a single person.
Sepulchure: One small hero is no match for the Shadowscythe.
Doom Blade: DON'T BE SO SURE. YOU WERE ONCE A SINGLE KNIGHT, AND LOOK AT YOU NOW! HAHAHAHAHAH!
Sepulchure: All over Lore, people huddle in pools of light... terrified. Trying to keep the Darkness back.
Sepulchure: It is a losing battle. The light is fading. <Character name> is one of the few remaining candles of hope.
Sepulchure: I will be the one to extinguish that candle.
Doom Blade: HAHAHAHAHAH! GOOD! JUST REMEMBER... THE MASTER'S PLAN FOR THE HERO ARE UNFINISHED.
Sepulchure: I grow tired of this scheming, and I grow tired of <Character name>. If we cross path's again...
Doom Blade: ... YOU WILL DO NOTHING! YOU WILL OBEY! HAHAHAHAHAH!
Sepulchure: We shall see...
Sepulchure: But for now we must concentrate on getting the energy orb.
Sepulchure: Time grows short and that orb must be ours soon.
Sepulchure: DRAKATH! Prepare the skeletal army. Tomorrow we begin our siege of Popsprocket...
Sepulchure: ...if we're lucky, <Character name> will just get caught in the crossfire.
Doom Blade: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Next Up: Richard's Gear
Level/Quest/Items required: Completion of Popguns
Release Date: March, 7th, 2009
Objective: Yix has asked you to travel into the caverns below Popsprocket to stop Richard's gear... the gear that power most of the city
Yix : Removing the whole tool storage facility? That was a dirty trick!
Yix : So Sepulchere is going for the orb too... and trying to stop you from getting there first.
Yix : Never fear! I have a plan!
Yix : Deep within the heart of Popsprocket is our oldest, largest gear that opperates most of the smaller gear in town.
Yix : It was put in town by Richard Fizzlesproing over a hundred years ago.
Yix : If you can cut the power to that very large gear, then none of the gear opperated doors in Popsprocket will open.
Yix : Sepulcher will have a lot of dead-locked doors in his way and you can keep moving through the tunnels with me as your guide!
Yix : You need to take your way to the heart of Popsprocket... I'll show you the entrance to the undertunnels.
Yix : Destroy any cyklon agents that you see and try not to get burned by the steam vents.
Yix : All you have to do is remove the power source that keeps Richard's Gear turning...
Yix : ...which is a gigantic robotic gerbil on a gigantic wheel...
Yix : ...which is powered by a smaller, real gerbil inside of it. Try not to hurt that little guy, ok?
<Character Name> : That has GOT to be the biggest mechanical gerbil, power by a real gerbil that I have ever seen.
Location: Popsprocket -> Yix -> Quests -> Pachelbel's Cannon
Level/Quest/Items required: Completion of Richard's Gear
Release Date: April 11th, 2009
Objective: Yix needs you to get on top of Sepulchure's Flying Dracolich Castle and slip a magic eye onto one of his flying eyes!
Objective completed: Now you've finally got the upper hand! If the Gnomish Magic Eye works the way it's supposed to (good luck) then you will have a direct line to Sepulchure's plans!
Yix: Sepulchure's undead minions are crawling all over the city, trying to fight their way to Balthar and the Energy Orb.
Yix: I had hoped that undead would keep the Cyklons busy enough for you to slip past them...
Yix: ...But I was wrong.
Yix: At least we knew what to expect from the Cyklons. We can't fight a battle on two fronts, <Your Character>.
Yix: We need information on Sepulchure's plans and troop movements, and I think I know just how to get it...
Yix: For the past few years we've been working on a project we call the Magic Eye.
Yix: It's a machine that can see images, then transmit them through the aether and we can view them.
Yix: We can view these images from a seperate location AS THEY ARE HAPPENING on a viewing device that we're calling a Far-a-vision!
Yix: Isn't that brilliant?!
<Your Character>: Oh, like a crystal ball!
Yix: Well, yes...
Yix: ...I suppose...
Yix: ...I suppose you could think of it like that...
<Your Character>: It sounds EXACTLY like that.
<Your Character>: Or a Magic Mirror. It sounds like that too.
Yix: FINE, YES! ANYWAY...
Yix: In the beginning the Magic Eyes were HUGE and bulky... nearly too large to move.
<Your Character>: That's funny, most crystal balls can fit in one hand.
Yix: Stop interrupting...
Yix: It wasn't very interesting seeing what was happening in the next room on a tiny screen when you could just walk in there...
<Your Character>: ...Or look into a...
Yix: RECENTLY... *glare*
Yix: ...the team has greatly reduced the size of the magic eye. Now it is barely noticeable.
Yix: Gaining entrance into Sepulchure's flying fortress would be impossible...
Yix: ...but we have spotted a flying eye roost at the top of one of the towers.
Yix: If we can get you up there with the Magic Eye, then you can attach it to one of the Flying eyeballs sleeping in the roost.
Yix: We would have one of Sepulchure's own flying eyes spying for us and no one would even know it!
Yix: It would also be the perfect field test for the new smaller micro-magic eye!
<Your Character>: So you want me to get on top of the flying dracolich castle, without being noticed...
<Your Character>: Then you want me to slip a spy-machine onto a sleeping flying eye... ALSO without being noticed.
<Your Character>: Then escape? Unnoticed?
Yix: Hm? OH YES! Escape... that's part of the plan too.
<Your Character>: Do I even want to know how you plan on getting me up there?
Yix: ...... No, probably not.
<Your Character>: Explain once more why I'm being shot out of a cannon.
Pachelbel: Because our catapult is having some bugs worked out of it by a researcher named Will E. Kaiotea.
Pachelbel: ... and if we used a rocket, we'd have to either ram you into the castle or detonate the rocket to get you to your target.
Pachelbel: This method is considered your safest bet.
<Your Character>: Being shot out of a cannon is safest... got it.
Pachelbel: Ok Yix, light the fuse!
Yix: Fuse lit, retreating to a safe distance.
<Your Character>: That's comforting.
Pachelbel: A few more seconds and you'll be soaring through the air.. the first human to fly!
Pachelbel: The world will never forget what you did here today, <Your Character>!
<Your Character>: That's what I'm afraid of.
*3... 2... 1... Blast Off!* *BLAM*
*A few hours later...*
Pachelbel: That was an amazing success, <Your Character>!
<Your Character>: I missed Sepulchure's Castle ENTIRELY...
<Your Character>: I landed in the Doomwood swamp and had to fight my way past lagoon goons to get back to a gryphon...
<Your Character>: Explain how that was a success.
Pachelbel: It was a learning experience!
<Your Character>: ... And what did you learn?
Pachelbel: To use less blasting powder and to eqiup you with an emergency parachutte.
<Your Character>: *sigh*
<Your Character>: Is this idea going to work?
Pachelbel: Sure it is... Light the fuse, Yix.
Yix: FIRE IN THE HOLE!
Pachelbel: ...once we get the trajectory right. We should only need to fire you three more times before we get the kinks worked out.
<Your Character>: WHAT? 3 more times?!? You mean, you're not going to get me up there on this try?
Pachelbel: HAHA! Don't be silly. We've never done this before... we need to calibrate the...
<Your Character>: GET ME OUTTA THIS THING!
Pachelbel: Oops, here comes the fuse. Good luck, <Your Character>! Fly! Soar like the eagle!
<Your Character>: Wait until I get out of this cannon! I'll make you SORE like the...
Pachelbel: Hey Yix, we lucked out. It looks like he made it this time!
Yix: We're SO good!
*After an unknown amount of time spent unconcious...*
<Your Character>: Blatharg lithmpule moffub foop... (Stars surround your character's head)
<Your Character>: ... No more badgers, please. I'm full.
<Your Character>: Ugh! (Stars disappear)
<Your Character>: ... I guess I made it.
<Your Character>: I hope I'm on the right floor, at least.
<Your Character>: Better get moving. The less time spent here the better.
*Your Character sees Mother Eyeball and two Eyeballs*
<Your Character>: Holy Mother of Eyeballs!
<Your Character>: Looks like I lucked out!
<Your Character>: None of the other eyes seem to have woken up...
<Your Character>: Now all I have to do is slip this...
<Your Character>: ... on one of these guys...
<Your Character>: ... and... Viola!
<Your Character>: This? This is the "greatly reduced in size MICRO-magic eye"?
<Your Character>: Well, too late to complain now. I'm sure that noone will notice.
<Your Character>: I'd better jump before any of these eyes wake up!
<Your Character>: I sure hope gnomish parachuttes work better than their cannons do.
*Your character is seen dropping from the Dracolich Castle and flying towards the ground*
<Your Character>: They don't work any better!
Next Up: Sitcom
Level/Quest/Items required: Completion of Pachelbel's Cannon
Release Date: April 24, 2009
Objective: See what the Magic-eye can see!
Objective completed: Sneed Agreed! You have got the beginnings of an army... sort of. But that will not be enough. Maybe some of the Pactogonal Knights can help you.
Yix: We're just about ready to turn on the Far-A-Vision.
Yix: I'm not sure what we'll see but you should prepare yourself for the worse.
Yix: If the picture isn't clear enough just wiggle the antenna on top there.
Yix: FINALLY! We're getting something on the Far-A-Vision!
Yix: Let's see if we can see what our little spy can see.
Drakath: My lord, we have combed the fortress' upper levels but have found no sign of the intruder.
Drakath: Who would dare invade our fortress?
Sepulchure: ...MY Fortress, Drakath. There is only one person on LORE who would dare risk my wrath. <<You>> will pay for this insult!
Drakath: What do you think <<You>> was doing? An assassination attempt?
Sepulchure: No. <<You>> knows that he could never get to me within my own fortress.
Sepulchure: I have no doubt that it was some ill-conceived plan to spy on me.
Drakath: The hero left too quickly to have learned anything about our plans to invade Popsprocket with your undead army, destroy the cyklon army...
Drakath: ... and seize the Energy Orb by force.
Sepulchure: Then he must have left something within the fortress.
Drakath: Some sort of.... device?
Drakath: Like a machine of some sort that the hero could attack to one of the minions.
Sepulchure: Yes, something like that.
Drakath: Um... Something that the hero might have attached to say... a flying eyeball?
Sepulchure: What are you prattling on about, Drakath?
Drakath: My Lord. I believe I have found the spy. BEHIND YOU!
Sepulchure: Drakath, you IDIOT. This was flying behind me the whole time you were describing our plans?
Drakath: Yes, my lord!
Sepulchure: That didn't strike you as a little ODD?
Drakath: I will catch the spy! Just... don't kill me!
<<You>>: This is GREAT! Do we have any popcorn?
Drakath: I got him! Don't worry!
Drakath: I got it! I got it!
Drakath: .... I don't got it.
Sepulchure: Stand aside, Drakath. I will capture it.
Drakath: *huff puff* Well done, my lord. Those things are *ZORCH* AHHHHHHHH!
Sepulchure: Let that be a lesson to you, prince of fools. And as for YOU....
Sepulchure: ...It does not matter that you know my plans. In fact, I invite you and your friends to try and stop me and my undead army.
Sepulchure: I have been forgiving so far, <<You>>, but that time is over.
Sepulchure: LONG UNLIVE THE SHADOWSCYTHE!
Yix: LUGNUTS! He destroyed the mini-magic eye. BUT IT WORKED! YIPEE!
<<You>>: Try to focus for a second, Yix.
<<You>>: We learned what we needed to from that loudmouth, Drakath.
<<You>>: Sepulchure is bringing WAR to Popsprocket.
<<You>>: We have to do everything in our power to keep him from getting the Energy Orb!
Yix: We can help you get around Popsprocket but we don't have the numbers or resources to fight a war.
<<You>>: The other heroes of Falconreach will come to the aid of Popsprocket but their numbers simply won't be enough.
<<You>>: We're going to have to find an army somewhere.
Yix: Where? How? We barely have enough gold to feed ourselves, much less an army.
Yix: All we have access to are warehouse after warehouse of empty boxes!
<<You>>: Hmmmm. That may be all we need. I'm going to need to borrow one of your gryphons...
King Sneed: What are you wanting?
King Sneed: ... Other than breaking more of sneevil's stuff?
<<You>>: King Sneed. I have come to ask for your help.
King Sneed: WHAT!?!?! You just knock out lots of sneevils on your way here? Now you want HELP?
<<You>>: Uh.... yes?
King Sneed: You need buy a book on asking politely.
King Sneed: Or a shrink.
<<You>>: I have noticed that you command a great army of sneevils who will fight bravely and I am willing to pay you well for your services.
King Sneed: Now you speaking my language, but we no want you gold!
<<You>>: Who said anything about gold? I can give you BOXES! A hundred thousand boxes!
King Sneed: A HUNDRED THOUSAND BOXES!?!?! ...Nibbleface!
Nibbleface: Yes, King Sneed?
King Sneed: Is hundred thousand boxes a lot?
Nibbleface: Yes, King Sneed.
King Sneed: ...
King Sneed: ... More than five?
Nibbleface: Yes, King Sneed.
King Sneed: WE DO IT!
Make Done Quest
Next Up: In-Sur-mountable
Location: Popsprocket -> Yix -> Quests -> More -> In-Sir-mountable
Level/Quest/Items required: Completion of Sitcom
Release Date: May 22nd, 2009
Objective: Can the Knights of Oaklore find time to help the Gnomes of Popsprocket? Let's hope so!
Objective completed: Hmm. I wonder if Captain Rolith has a solution for who can help the gnomes of Popsprocket.
Yix: We need the help from the rest of the heroes in Lore. Fighting a war on two fronts won't work.
Yix: Talk to Knight Captain Rolith, see if he and the Pactaganol Knights will fight in our defense.
Yix: Saving our city and keeping the orb safe are of utmost importance.
Yix: I have faith you'll make them see how much we need their help, <<You>>.
Captain Rolith: Greetings, <<You>>! I didn't expect to see you here, I only just decided to send word asking for your aid.
<<You>>: YOU were going to ask ME for help?
Captain Rolith: Well, yes. You do have a reputation for being something of a hero. Some of our younger Knights say you can handle anything.
Captain Rolith: Since I have to stay back and direct our efforts, you would be good for morale directly on the battlefield.
<<You>>: I, um, well. Thank you, I appreciate that. But, you see, I came here to ask YOU for help. There's this invasion...
Captain Rolith: Oh, we know. The bandits are all over. All my Knights are out battling them valiantly.
<<You>>: No, no. I'm talking about robots. A robot invasion.
Captain Rolith: ... I'm pretty sure these bandits are human. Do you need to lie down?
<<You: No, no time to sleep. I'm talking about Popsprocket. There are robots on Popsprocket! The gnomes there need your help.
<<You>>: You and your Knights could turn the tide of the coming war if you have the time to come and help us.
Captain Rolith: I see, I see. I'm sure we'd love to help you, but...
Captain Rolith: But, like I said, we're in the middle of our OWN invasion.
Captain Rolith: Somehow, someone or something convinced all the separate bandit bands to unite and assault our town and fortress.
Captain Rolith: I won't order my Knights to abandon their battle in the middle of it, but if some of them are willing to assist you, I'll allow them to join you.
Captain Rolith: You'll need to ask them yourself, though. I'm in the middle of planning a large-scale retaliation attack.
Sir Vivor: <<You>>! I'm glad to see you! Sir Comvent here was trying to sneak past some bandits when they turned on him.
<<You>>: That's awful! Speaking of people being attacked... I could really use your help for my friends.
<<You>>: They're gnomes on a floating island called Popsp-
Sir Vivor: I'm too busy guarding his hide to try and seek out help right now, and much too busy to offer it if you need it.
Sir Vivor: I'm sorry, but maybe the others will have time to help you.
Sir Junn: Hello, <<You>>. I see you've stumbled upon my field hospital.
Sir Junn: You haven't seen Sir Gerry, have you? We could use a pair o' docs here, but it would create an impossible situation.
<<You>>: Sorry, can't say that I have. I DID see a city full of gnomes who need your help, though.
Sir Junn: Look around. I've got patients with no patience, stuck full of I.V.s, and I just have to hope my work isn't in vein.
<<You>>: I see. You really DO look busy.
Sir Junn: No, the ICU is pretty quiet right now. All the knights left it, insisting they could fight wounded. Lunatics.
Sir Junn: Please, either grab a bandage roll or find me a nurse who will. I hope you're not squeamish about blood.
<<You>>: I'll... just... go... over... there... and see if I can find Sir Chandestroy and talk to him. Bye!
<<You>>: Were you... hiding from those bandits?
Sir Reptishus: I'm known for my ability to scout! When people think of spying, they think of Sir Reptishus!
<<You>>: Oh. Maybe I shouldn't have routed them, then.
Sir Reptishus: No, no. You've just freed me up. I will take Sir Vey and we'll go scout out other bandit camps.
Sir Reptishus: They are attacking Oaklore from all directions. We're hard-pressed to keep up with their invasion.
<<You>>: I guess that means you're ALL too busy to help me save the gnomes of Popsprocket.
Sir Reptishus: It looks like your gnome friends are going to get the short end of the stick.
<<You>>: Then it's back to Captain Rolith for me. Maybe he'll have ideas of who I can go to next.
Next Up: Rolith's Solution
Level/Quest/Items required: Completion of In-Sir-mountable
Release Date: May 22nd, 2009
Objective: This... THIS is the help he gives?
Objective completed: Well, I'm sure you'll find SOME way to use them!
Yix: I'm sure Captain Rolith will have a suitable alternative for us!
Captain Rolith: Back already? You move quickly for a <<Class>>.
<<You>>: I spoke with all the Knights I could find nearby. I think you can already guess their answers.
Captain Rolith: I'm sorry, <<You>>. I knew you had to ask for yourself, but I did know.
Captain Rolith: However... I think I have an idea which could help.
Captain Rolith: Why don't you head back to Popsprocket, and I will send the force once I gather them.
<<You>>: Thank you, Captain. The gnomes and I will be indebted to whomever you send!
Captain Rolith: Here they come...
Captain Rolith: Down boy!
Captain Rolith: Haha, ok here's a treat.
Captain Rolith: ...
Captain Rolith: No, that's my hand.
Captain Rolith: ...
Captain Rolith: That's still my hand.
Captain Rolith: Now remember, if you go to the big <<Class>>, <<You>>, on the floating island, he will have tog-treats for you. Lots and lots of tog-treats.
Captain Rolith: Give this letter to the first person you see, so they know you're there to help.
Captain Rolith: Ok lil' buddy, go find that flying island!
Captain Rolith: ...
Captain Rolith: They'll know when the togs arrive...
Captain Rolith: And maybe WE will be able to sleep peacefully for once.
Zapp: Come one, <<Class>>... It's not that hard to deliver a letter. *snore*
Zapp: No, I'm not going to pay you...
Zapp: Mumble mumble...
Zapp: More soup'n...
Zapp: MORE visitors? Last time I checked, this wasn't tourist season.
Zapp: *grumble* And with that many, we're going to need ALL of the mechgryphons, half-trained or not.
Zapp: ..Oaklore decided to help us after all.
Next Up: Ex Machina
Location: Popsprocket -> Yix -> Quests -> More -> Ex Machina
Level/Quest/Items required: Completion of Rolith's Solution
Release Date: May 29th, 2009
Objective: All life on Lore will eventually be terminated?! That must not happen!
Objective completed: New email from Rokubot_07: Dave? Hey Dave? Why haven't you been answering my emailz? Daaaaaave!
Yix: We'll need to start planning the details of the war, <<You>>!
Yix: I'm sure Sepulchure has a plan already.
Yix: We need to go off and talk without interruptions, and really get things moving!
Yix: ... Ok, so we've got the sneevils.
<<You>>: Right. And the herd of togs.
Yix: Mhmm, mhmm. You'll come up with a use for them, I'm sure.
<<You>>: Right, right. Just... give me a few more days to brainstorm.
<<You>>: And there are the... er...
Yix: The other gnomes and I will help, of course.
<<You>>: If only that tool storage facility were still here, I could -
???: I am Dave v384.16. You are <<You>>, the <<Class>>, and Yix, acting leader of Popsprocket.
<<You>>: Yix! Get back! I'll take him!
Dave v384.16: HALT. I am not the enemy you think I am.
<<You>>: So... you're and enemy I don't know about yet?
Dave v384.16: Negative. *clank* Affirmative. *whirrrr* Results inconclusive at this time.
<<You>>: Then who ARE you?
Dave v384.16: You are about to engage cyklons created by Balthar, a gnome who is producing machines beyond his level of skill.
<<You>>: Thanks, we ARE aware of that much already.
Dave v384.16: I am an agent of those with interests similar to yours.
Dave v384.16: The coming war will impact the future of your race on this planet.
<<You>>: Wait. What??
Dave v384.16: Please watch this.
Sepulchure: AHAHAHA! And <<You>> will be fighting my minions AND these machines!
Sepulchure: It won't be MY fault if he fails to survive. AND I'll have the Energy Orb.
Drakath: But- but- I thought you wanted to crush the Cyklon army, too.
Sepulchure: I don't CARE if there are cyklons left over. They can attack the rest of the towns on Lore, for all I care.
Sepulchure: Any havoc they wreak only plays into my plans.
Drakath: But you're going to destroy a lot of them, right? They're too creepy to keep around.
Dave v384.16: When Sepulchure attacks the Cyklon army, he initiates a sequence of events which result in the cyklons replicating in extreme numbers.
Dave v384.16: They do this in order to resist him, but become so many that all life and unlife on Lore are threatened.
<<You>>: So your race decided to EXTERMINA-
Yix: Stop that.
<<You>>: Now, don't take this the wrong way, but you're a Cyklon, right?
Dave v384.16: Affirmative, but of a different generation.
<<You>>: And you don't WANT the Cyklons to mass-produce?
Dave v384.16: Affirmative. I am from the future, re-programmed and sent back by a man named Drakath.
Dave v384.16: He was told by a talking sword to prevent this future from happening.
Dave v384.16: I am to ensure that it doesn't. You will assist me.
<<You>>: Drakath?! How did HE manage to teleport you?
Dave v384.16: My records indicate that I was contained within a unit with more volume on the inside than it's outer appearance indicated.
Dave v384.16: The most efficient way to do this is to convince Sepulchure to exterminate the Cyklons entirely.
Dave v384.16: You will assist me in reaching my target.
Yix: Well, we DO have a way to do that, if you'd prefer to avoid using the cannon.
<<You>>: Trust me, we do.
Yix: There's always the sky-net.
<<You>>: A sky net? That sounds only slightly less dangerous than the cannon.
Yix: Only if it becomes self-aware and decides it doesn't like you.
Dave v384.16: What is the probability of that event occurring?
<<You>>: Well, it sounds like Yix made it, so ... about 50/50.
Dave v384.16: Your levity is good, human, it relieves tension.
<<You>>: And the fear of death.
<<You>>: ..It really IS a net.
Yix: ..What did you expect?
<<You>>: I'm... not really sure.
<<You>>: So, what's your plan for convincing Sepulchure to destroy the cyklons?
Dave v384.16: It is simple.
Dave v384.16: I am going to provoke him into losing his temper. Then he will lash out at Balthar's machines.
<<You>>: We aren't ready for the coming war yet, so...
<<You>>: I'm sorry, I can't let you do that, Dave.
Dave v384.16: The most efficient way to initiate an emotional reaction is to postulate that he is unable to destroy the existing cyklons.
Dave v384.16: Chance of predicted reaction resulting in immediate attacks on the cyklon army: 100%.
<<You>>: You can't do that!
Dave v384.16: Wrong.
Doom Blade: SEPULCHURE! DEAL WITH... THIS.
Drakath: ...Hey boss?
Drakath: ...Ever get the feeling like someone is watching you?
Drakath: With one of the Cyklons?!
Sepulchure: So, a pre-emptive attack of my well-defended fortress? How brave of you. No... not brave. What's that other word?
Sepulchure: That's it!
<<You>>: Oh no. This time I'm not running things. It's all Dave's show right now. He wanted to meet you.
Dave v384.16: Affirmative. I was sent to speak to the human who intends to steal the Energy Orb and attack the Cyklon army.
Sepulchure: Might makes right, and I am VERY mighty. If that gnome who has it now can stop me from taking it, he can keep it.
Dave v384.16: You are the very foolish human, to think that you could exterminate enough of the Cyklons to reach the Energy Orb.
Sepulchure: *sneer* you underestimate me, machine. My powers far outstrip those of some buckets of bolts.
Drakath: But... doesn't <<You>> want to-
Sepulchure: Be quiet, Drakath. I'm boasting.
Dave v384.16: We have computed your chances of success. They approach zero.
Drakath: I could swear <<You>> wanted to defeat the cyk-
Sepulchure: You will see, machine...
Sepulchure: You and <<You>> both! You doubt me?! I will obliterate ALL the Cyklons!
Sepulchure: This is how the DARKNESS takes care of problems! And we're...
Sepulchure: ...STARTING WITH YOU!
Dave v384.16: Will I... dream? *whirrrr* My mind... *clank*.... it's going.
Dave v384.16: Daisy... Daisy.... give me your ....... answer....... do.......
Sepulchure: And as for you, <<You>>...
Sepulchure: Since you kindly obliged me by entering my fortress voluntarily, why don't I just take care of you now?
Drakath: My Lord? Weren't you told NOT to-
Sepulchure: Drakath, go do something useful. NOW.
Drakath: ... Yes, My Lord.
Sepulchure: <<You>>, get out. Go gather your precious allies. I will crush them all. War is coming!
Next Up: Assault on Popsprocket
Other names: Popsprocker War!
Location: Falconreach -> Popsprocket War-> To Battle, Popsprocket -> Yix -> Quests -> More -> To war!
Level/Quest/Items required: Completion of Ex Machina
Release Date: June 5, 2009
Finishing Date: June 19, 2009
Date of Removal: N/A
Total of Waves: 3,500,000
• Battle Cyklons: The Cyklons are determined to take Popsprocket over before you do them in!
• Battle Undead Minions: Sepulchure is determined to get to that Energy Orb before you do AND take out the Cyklons!
• Battle Cyklons: Gears and bolts and widgets are EVERYwhere now. I hope Yix can reuse all these parts!
• Battle Undead Minions: Maybe the togs can use the skeletons bones as chew toys.
Yix: War has come to Popsprocket, <Character>! Battle the Cyklons and Sepulchure's undead to save our city AND the Energy Orb!
Yix: It has begun [Name]. The assault on the Cyklon and the undead must begin if our city is to survive.
Yix: <Name>, for all of your work defending our city on two fronts, I've added an item you can purchase to put in your house. For remembrance!
Yix: Gather 5 Gears of War, <Character>, to unlock the boss fight and cutscenes!
Yix: Lets go over the plan one more time, [Name].
Yix: For now, you will need to do your best you can until our secret weapon is ready. The rest of us here will work on that.
Yix: Its your choice whether to go take on the Cyklons or the undead(or both), but just remember.....
Yix: Sepulchure is after the Energy Orb! If we lose and he gets it, not only will our city be at risk, but eventually the whole world will feel the effects.
Talk and Shop:
Yix: The sneak attack has launched, <Name>!
Yix: As we speak, the Togriders, led by General Sneevord, have charged at the masses of undead and cyklons!
Yix: If we're lucky, they'll take out a huge chunk of our enemies, allowing you and the other heroes to finish up the battle.
Yix: The undead are pushing closer to where we believe Balthar hides, though, and the Cyklons are replicating at a rapid rate!
You also gain access to the War Shop.
Yix: The Energy Orb is safe and Sepulchure has been thwarted!
Yix: With the help of the Togriders, you have managed to vanish ALL the cyklons AND the undead!
Yix: You have saved our city, and our future.
Yix: Our city- and the Energy Orb- would have been lost without all of your efforts. You have our gratitude!
Boss Fight: The City Fights Back!
Location: Falconreach -> Popsprocket War-> To Battle -> Recruit Voltabolt
Level required: None
Release Date: 5th June 2009
Theres got to be some way to get some more help. Can Dr. Voltabolt possibly offer any?
Well, mechanical togs VILL increaze the zize of the tog army. It iz good you talked to ze Doktor!
Voltabolt: Ah, [Name], it eez a pleazure to zee you again. Haf you come to learn ze art of Dentiztry?
Voltabolt: Why yez, I know of ze gnomez there. Of courze I do.
Voltabolt: Ze leetle mechanical, Dentizt-hating gnomez.
Voltabolt: Did you know ze made me leave Popzproket? I had learned zo much there but nooooo.
Voltabolt: My pazzion for ze art of Dentiztry was FORBIDDEN! Ze call it Dark Art
Voltabolt: *incoherent grumbling*
Voltabolt: You vant ME to help ZEM? After all I haf just told you? I realize there is a var going on, but.....
Voltabolt: Vell. Hrm. I do haf a fondness for ze city of Popzprocket, even if it iz overrun by ze gnomez
Voltabolt: If you can help me, I will help you. I haf zome extra mechanical togz, you can haf those. But first....
Voltabolt: I waz....tinkering...with ze Doom Cola machine and it.... haz exploded. Cola iz everyvere!
Voltabolt: I had brought in inzectz to study for...vell nevermind for vhat you do not need to know. But I had brought zem into ze houze.
Voltabolt: Now zey are all over ze spilled cola in my perfectly normal houze, and I can not get anything done!
Voltabolt: If you can clear out ze inzectz, you can haf my mechanical togz to add to your army
Location: Assault on Popsprocket -> To the Orb!
Level/Quest/Items required: None
Release Date: June 19th, 2009
Objective: Its got to be somewhere! And I bet Balthar is with it!
Objective completed: Now, on to find Balthar and the Energy Orb!
Yix: Welcome back, <Character>. Your efforts in the war are an inspiration to us all.
Yix: Thanks to the help of you, the heroes of Lore, our togriding friends, and Sepulchure taking out large groups of them...
Yix: ...the Cyklon army has been handled. Right now, we have to worry about the energy orb.
Yix: Nix, a gadget genius, has managed to cobble together something that can detect emanations from the energy orb.
Yix: It's located a large concentration of residual energy in the tunnels of the city, and we believe that is where the Cyklon base is.
Yix: We have to assume that Sepulchure has ways of gathering the same information, so there's no time to waste.
Yix: You'll need to get to that base as soon as possible!
D-4Q1: *whirrrrrr*INTRUDER DETECTED. HALT INTRUDER. IDENTIFY.
<You>: My identity? That's a pretty philisophical question, isn't it?
<You>: I mean, sure, I am a hero. I'm a <Class Title>. But as for who I AM, well, that takes some introspection, doesn't it?
D-4Q1: *clank*FAILURE TO STATE IDENTITY WILL RESULT IN COMPLETE DESTRUCTION OF INTRUDING UNIT.
<You>: Well, why didn't you just say so? I'm your worst nightmare.
<You>: YIX! YIX, ARE YOU THERE?
Yix: *sigh*I can hear you just fine.
<You>: OH- I mean oh, right. Anyways...
<You>: I'm pretty sure I found the Cyklon base. There was this giant Cyklon who looked kind of like a golden garbage can, but with legs.
<You>: I fought him but he, well, kind of exploded and cyklon-bits got all stuck in the door-machinery.
<You>: I don't think there's an easy way to get this thing open short of blasting it apart. But that would probably doestroy anything important in the room.
<You>: On the plus side, though, I doubt Sepluchure could get in here without breaking things, either! No orb for him!
Yix: We gnomes are known for our inventiveness. And one of our standard invention-procedures is to always leave a back door!
<You>: Do you mean to tell me...
Yix: There'as a back door. Into the room. Here's how you get there-
Other names: Balthar
Location: Assault on Popsprocket
Level/Quest/Items required: None
Release Date: June 19th, 2009
Objective: Not you!
Objective completed: I could have SWORN he was the bad guy!
After a few minutes of listening to directions and a few hours of crawling through the dark, dusty, spyder-infested ventilation tubes...
You come out into a... closet?!
<<You>>: OW, that HURT! ... Hmm. This must be the doorknob. I hope.
???: A little help here, please?
Balthar: Hey... THANKS!
Balthar: No really, they didn't even have a toi- er, let's just say, thanks for opening the door.
<<You>>: Are you alright?! Yix didn't tell me any of the gnomes had been captured!
<<You>>: How did you get here? How long have you been here?
???: I wasn't here at first, I was in my lab with my experiments. Then things started to go VERY wrong.
<<You>>: What happened?!
???: My experiments started waking up! And then, well, they kind of started taking over. And started with me.
<<You>>: Wait. Are you saying you're... BALTHAR?
Balthar: *chuckle* That's me!
<<You>>: But you're the BAD guy!
Balthar: Oh, no. No no no. Not bad! Just... curious.
Balthar: You see, I'd been mapping the lower levels of Popsprocket when I found this glowing orb buried in the rubble of an old building.
<<You>>: The Energy Orb!
Balthar: Exactly. But I didn't know that yet. So I took it back to my lab (two turns to the left and up a level, pasy the Doo-hickey Demolisher).
Balthar: I started doing- well, nevermind the details, they're very technical. Lets just say once I was done, my inanimate Cyklons were ALIVE!
<<You>>: You put the widget in the gadget and the sprocket in the sproinger?
Balthar: Something like that. Anyways... once the energy from the Orb had saturated the metal, they were alive.
Balthar: And FAR stronger than I was! But... they couldn't use the orb themselves! So they put this Movement Incapacitor v3.14 on me.
<<You>>: To force you to make more of them?
<<You>>: And you still have the Orb?
Balthar: I do! It's hidden in a hole back in my cell. The cyklons all rushed off a bit ago to fight the togriders and left me with it.
<<You>>: I think Yix needs to hear all this.
Balthar: ... And so that's how I got the Energy Orb and the Cyklons took over.
General Sneevord: Curiosity kill cats. Curiosity make cyklons killing machines.
Yix: I'm glad to know you didn't intend this, Mechagius. We hated thinking you'd turned your back on us.
General Sneevord: So what we do now?
<<You>>: The Cyklons have been recycled. The Undead are re-dead. Now we need to hammer the dents out of the city's buildings.
<<You>>: Yix, you and the rest of the Gnomes should keep the Energy Orb. You can study it and care for it.
<<You>>: Maybe Balthar can even find a way to harness its energy and create GOOD cyklons.
Balthar: While I was in my cell, I thought of multiple ways I could have prevented this.
Balthar: I REALLY didn't mean to have this happen. Or become a prisoner. The cell was small. And dark. And wet.
<<You>>: What do you say, Yix? Will you keep the Orb safe for me?
Yix: We would be honored. And just think of all the useful things it can help us do!
<<You>>: Excellent. Then General Sneevord and I will go pour water on all the sparking Cyklon-parts to make sure they can't rise again.
General Sneevord: We make done war! REAL good!
<<You>>: That was the plan!
Sepulchure: That orb was supposed to be MINE!
Doom Blade: Your minions? Dead undead. No using them again now. And the Master is displeased.
Doom Blade: He... wishes you to see him. He would like to speak with you.
Sepulchure: But <<You>> is RIGHT. THERE!
Doom Blade: Now.
Yix: Uh oh. That's-
<<You>>: What do you mean "Uh oh"?
Yix: I- I've never seen it say THIS before!
<<You>>: Uh oh.